I have been basically avoiding this area to write about for a long time now.

But I thought at some point that I have to write it anyway.

My relationship has been a roller coaster ride. I have been a love sick girl and I hated it.

 

One day, after doing all the crazy stuff that I have done, I just woke up and realized it was enough. It wasn’t me anymore and that I was going nowhere.

 

We were never on the same page. I was emotional and she was rational. We were both so frustrated with our situation. We hurt each other at some point. We both know we really love each other but there was always pride and no one ever really compromised. No one ever really sat down to talk it out. And that’s a stepping stone to splitsville. And we ended up being there.

 

I moved out of her place and decided not to reach out to her anymore the day I realized I had to stop being the love sick girl that I was. It was dreadful but I knew I had to go through this phase and stop pretending like it didn’t happened.

 

After sometime she started reaching out to me. I was mad at first. I was in rage but I knew it was just all pride. We both knew the fact that both of us have been feeding on our own selfish ways.

We both know we need to think things through without the voices of the other people we have involved. We need to talk. Just us — the two of us and no one else inside the circle.

We sat down and talked about it without prejudice, excluded the past mistakes and didn’t blame each other.

We decided to give ourselves three months to think things over without telling anybody else and without all the shit we’ve involved other people.

It has been almost 2 weeks since we started doing it and God it feels great! Whatever the outcome is, whatever happens. I know I am not that love sick girl anymore. And I am happy about that with myself. 🙂

mariel

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